If i based my new year's resolutions on today's spam...

1. Look good and feel great
2. Learn the secrets of porn stars
3. Effectively enlarge my cup size
4. Claim my cut of that Nigerian cash
5. Purchase that banned CD
6. Triple my investment in only one week
7. Get paid to work from home
8. Get the perfect loan without perfect credit
9. Tell them it's not a mistake, I do have platinum status
10. Get the car I want with easy finance
11. Earn that degree
12. Watch the Paris Hilton video for free
13. Learn to play pool like a pro
14. Verify that my Citibank, PayPal, nor eBay accounts have been tampered with
15. Take advantage of the coolest mobile phone with a great rate plan
16. Improve my figure
17. Improve my credit score
18. Grow ten years younger in 30 days
19. Get my Cupid cursors for Valentine's day
20. Copy all my DVDs to CDs
21. Learn a new career
22. Collection my auction winnings
23. Cut my top placement costs
24. Order my 85 free business cards
25. Learn about my miliraty benefits
26. Survive my home improvement project
27. Buy the perfect memorable and loving gift
28. Descramble my digital cable
29. Get a Rolex for only $65
30. Last all night